All Out of Love

We're celebrating my son, Baby Selwyn, turning a month old. I'm walking past the pool with him in my arms when someone shoves me from behind. Colin Selwyn jumps into the pool like a madman. He saves us and immediately rushes us to the hospital. Baby Selwyn makes it out alive because of the timely rescue. When I open my eyes again, Baby Selwyn and Colin aren't by my side. I sit up while coughing and remove the needle inserted into my hand. I leave the hospital room and head for the pediatric department, wanting to see Baby Selwyn. However, as I walk past the emergency room, I hear Colin talking to a doctor. "We managed to save the child from drowning, Mr. Selwyn. Why has he now died of asphyxiation?" "I smothered him. Per the plan, he was never supposed to make it out alive!" "But why? He's your son!" "I promised Sandy that I would make our child the Selwyn family's sole heir. Lucille should never have given birth to Baby Selwyn." Colin's tone is gentle and calm, yet his words are cold and cruel. I've always thought I had a loving marriage, but it's just a joke! I've already lost my beloved son, and my heartless husband is the one behind his death. I don't want him anymore! Chapter 1 We threw a party to celebrate my son, Baby Selwyn, turning a month old. I was walking past the pool with him in my arms when someone shoved me from behind. Colin Selwyn jumped into the pool like a madman. He saved us and immediately rushed us to the hospital. Baby Selwyn made it out alive because of the timely rescue. When I opened my eyes again, Baby Selwyn and Colin weren't by my side. I sat up while coughing and removed the needle inserted into my hand. I left the hospital room and headed for the pediatric department, wanting to see Baby Selwyn. However, as I walked past the emergency room, I heard Colin talking to a doctor. "We managed to save the child from drowning, Mr. Selwyn. Why has he now died of asphyxiation?" "I smothered him. Per the plan, he was never supposed to make it out alive!" "But why? He's your son!" "I promised Sandy that I would make our child the Selwyn family's sole heir. Lucille should never have given birth to Baby Selwyn." The doctor's eyes widened in surprise. He asked hesitantly, "You're going to swap Sandy's baby in as a stand-in? The two babies may have been born on the same day, but they look nothing alike. Won't Mrs. Selwyn notice?" "Relax. Both babies have blue eyes, high noses, and dimples. They take after me. I'll bring over the new baby in a few days. Lucille won't suspect a thing. Just make sure you handle Baby Selwyn's body for me. And don't forget the sterilization meds I asked for. I'm giving them to Lucille." The doctor sounded unsure. "Mr. Selwyn, this drug could hurt her uterus. She fell into the pool not long after giving birth, and that already put a strain on her womb. If she takes this, she may never be able to have kids again." "That's not a concern. I promised Sandy I wouldn't have any more kids. No child could ever compete for love with ours." "Mr. Selwyn, please think this through. If Mrs. Selwyn takes this, she may never be able to have kids again. It's too much!" The doctor kept trying to talk Colin out of it, unwilling to hand over the medication. "What are you talking about? I'm not going to treat her badly. Mrs. Selwyn's title is hers to keep. I'm taking care of her for the rest of her life. She already has a son. So what if she can't have kids anymore? "Sandy's married now. All she left me was this kid. From now on, I'm going to live a good life with Lucille." I stood barefoot on the cold floor, the chill creeping into my heart. So, Colin was offering me nothing but the empty title of Mrs. Selwyn. Was this really the kind of marriage I wanted? Out of nowhere, Colin's phone rang. He put it on speaker, and a man's frantic voice filled the room. "Mr. Selwyn, I already erased the surveillance footage from the villa. No one's going to find out I shoved Mrs. Selwyn into the pool, right?" "Calm down. I made sure everyone was out of the way. No one saw anything. I've wired a million dollars to your account. Get out today and make sure Lucille never sees you again!" Their voices and footsteps grew louder, so I stumbled back to my hospital room. Tears streamed down my face, soaking the crisp white sheets. I never imagined Colin could do something so cruel just to make Sandy's child the only heir to the Selwyns! When Colin and I got married, I knew he still had feelings for someone else—Sandy Wentworth, his childhood sweetheart. They never ended up together. She married someone else, and he married me. I loved Colin enough to accept that Sandy would always have a special place in his heart. I gave him everything I had for three years, and I thought our relationship was getting stronger. One day, he said, "Lue, let's have a baby!" I broke down in tears, feeling like my love finally paid off. I honestly thought he started to love me back. But what I heard today completely crushed that fantasy. Poor Baby Selwyn. He was so small and delicate when he was born; he only recently became all plump and rosy. He used to smile at everyone. He just figured out how to roll over. He would stretch out his tiny arms, flashing that sweet, innocent grin. Baby Selwyn loved being in my arms, and he also loved reaching for Colin. But that same person who would scoop him up and lift him high was the one who took his life. How could Colin ever live with that? Chapter 2 "Lucille, why are you crying? Baby Selwyn's fine," Colin said as he came into my hospital room, holding a thermos. "He just needs a few more days in the nursery. Don't worry about it!" He saw my tears and rushed over, fumbling to wipe them off. I pulled away from him, my stomach turning. I turned to the side and gagged, using the moment to break free from his arms. His touch made me feel sick. Colin pulled back his arms, looking uncomfortable. Then, he picked up the thermos. "Drink some water, Lucille. I got these pills from the nurse. Take them and get some sleep. You'll feel better after a rest." I stared at the pills in his hand, his words to the doctor still ringing in my ears. Just when I thought my heart was completely numb, a fresh wave of pain hit me. "What are these?" I asked, staring him down. Colin avoided my gaze, looking uneasy. "It's just some cold medicine. You fell in the pool and were really shaken up. You should take something so you don't get sick," he explained. "I'm not taking them. I need to breastfeed Baby Selwyn. I can't just take any medication." Colin paused for a second, his voice softening as he said, "I get that Baby Selwyn's important, but your health comes first. I'll make sure he gets fed. You just focus on getting your strength back. I know someone…" He glanced at me, then quickly turned his gaze away. "Yeah, you know, Sandy. Her baby was born too early and didn't make it, but she's still producing milk. It'd be a shame for it to go to waste, so I asked her to help feed Baby Selwyn." Colin's words hit me like a punch to the gut. I never imagined he would be bold enough to go this far. I was so stunned that I didn't resist when he shoved the pills into my mouth. The bitter taste coated my tongue, sinking like a weight in my chest. A second later, a sharp pain sliced through my abdomen. It was so intense, I thought I might black out. A warm rush of fluid ran down my legs, and in no time, bright red blood soaked through the clean sheets underneath me. In my foggy state, I heard Colin's frantic voice. "Doctor! Get over here! She's bleeding out!" They rushed me back into the operating room. I could hear frantic footsteps and nurses shouting in tense, urgent voices. "Get to the blood bank. She's losing too much blood!" "This is bad. We're running low…" Then, everything went dark. … When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was Colin, his face drained of color. "Lucille, you're awake! You lost a lot of blood. The blood bank was low, so I gave mine to help save you. How are you feeling?" he asked. He glanced at me, shifting awkwardly as he continued, "The doctor said falling into that freezing pool in the dead of winter messed up your uterus. That's why you hemorrhaged. You won't be able to… have kids anymore." Chapter 3 "Don't be upset. At least we've got Oliver. One kid's enough. I wouldn't want you going through the pain of childbirth again," Colin said. Oliver? Was that what he named Sandy's baby? It was such a beautiful name, one that brought a sense of peace. Our child was only ever called Baby Selwyn up until now. It wasn't because Colin was proud. It was because he couldn't even be bothered to name our baby. Fighting back my tears, I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep. Everything that happened today left me completely broken. I wasn't ready to deal with it yet. "Try to get some sleep. I'll stay with you tonight," Colin murmured, pulling the blanket around me. "I know it's tough. Get some rest. I'm not going anywhere. Once Oliver's ready to leave the nursery, I'll bring him over to see you." I pulled the covers up over my head. His voice grated on me even more in the dark. "From now on, the three of us are going to be a happy family!" he said. I couldn't help but smile, but it was a bitter one. If I hadn't heard the truth for myself, I probably would have stayed clueless, helping the man who killed Baby Selwyn raise Oliver just for Sandy's sake. I would have probably ended up spending my whole life stuck in the false happiness he'd set up for me. Right then, Colin's phone rang. He quickly stepped outside to answer it, only to rush back in a minute later. "Lucille, I'm sorry, but there's a work emergency I need to take care of. I'll be back soon, alright? Wait for me!" He was gone before I could say anything. The room fell completely silent. I had no idea how long I lay there before finally grabbing my phone and opening social media. I stared at the red notification, my fingers shaking as I tapped on it. It was a selfie of Sandy holding a baby. The caption read, "Baby's daddy made me a healthy meal after I gave birth and even prepped baby food. He's really getting the hang of it. We both love it!" In the photo, Sandy and Oliver were smiling sweetly at the camera. Behind them, a man was busy in the kitchen. His figure was hard to make out, but I spotted that royal blue down vest. It was the limited-edition one I had a friend get for Colin from overseas, knowing how much he loved that color. So, that was his "emergency"—cooking for the woman he loved and their child. I didn't even know he could cook. He never set foot in the kitchen in the three years we were married. Even when I had a fever of 104 degrees Fahrenheit and was bedridden for two days, all he did was order me a burger by tapping a few buttons on his phone. It couldn't be more obvious just how much he was willing to do for someone he truly loved. Chapter 4 Sandy's social media account was packed with posts about her pregnancy. I scrolled through every single one and discovered that the guy keeping her company while she was on bed rest was none other than my husband, Colin. For the eight months after I found out I was pregnant, Colin was always away on business trips. He was hardly ever home. I didn't want to interfere with his work, so I dealt with all the pregnancy challenges on my own. I even went alone for my prenatal appointments. I never imagined those "business trips" were just a cover for him to be with Sandy while she was pregnant. Sandy's long social media updates documented everything from her pregnancy to the birth of her child. Colin even started trying to cook healthy meals, and she posted about it. "Darling's first time cooking. I'm so touched! But it ended up getting burnt, so I couldn't bring myself to try it. He ate it all, then spent half the day running to the bathroom." At that time, I was stuck with morning sickness and couldn't keep anything down. I messaged Colin, but it would take him forever to respond, and it was always the same. "Don't force it if you can't eat. You'll eat when you're hungry enough. I'm not a chef. Asking me won't help." On the other hand, Sandy posted about her swollen legs and back pain. "My calves are so swollen I can't even wear cute skirts. It's all his fault. I'm punishing him—no sleep tonight until he soaks my feet and gives them a massage!" I couldn't bring myself to keep reading. Tears blurred my vision. I couldn't keep fooling myself. Colin never loved me. Sandy was the only person who mattered to him from the beginning. I grabbed my phone and dialed the number that ran through my mind a million times before. It barely rang once before someone picked up. "Lucille, you finally came to your senses and decided to call me?" "I'm sorry for letting you down, Professor Roland. Is there still a chance for me to join your research project?" "Of course. I told you—you're always welcome. You're my star student. I was so disappointed when you dropped out of college to get married, but I'm glad you've changed your mind!" I booked a flight to leave the country in a week. I would erase every trace of my life here and walk away with nothing tying me down in seven days. That night, Colin didn't come home. He didn't show up the next day or the day after. He didn't even bother calling me. Then, on the day I was discharged, he finally showed up in my hospital room, carrying takeout. "Lucille, I brought you something healthy. Eat up. I'll take care of the discharge paperwork in a bit," he said. I glanced at the takeout bag in his hand, remembering Sandy's social media posts of him cooking in the kitchen. That was when it finally dawned on me that his care for me was always half-hearted. When we got home, I saw my mother-in-law, Grace Falkman, sitting on the couch in the living room with Sandy, teasing Oliver. They were chatting and laughing, looking as close as a mother and daughter. Sandy was wearing silk pajamas, and her skin was glowing and smooth. She looked stunning—a sharp contrast to how exhausted I looked. Grace shot me a look of pure disgust and snapped, "All you did was hold Oliver, and you still ended up falling into the pool? You should've just drowned! Thank goodness, Oliver's fine. I would've kicked you out of the family if anything had happened to him! "Look at you—still in hospital clothes. You're an eyesore! Has Colin been treating you like crap? You and Sandy both had babies, but somehow she looks amazing, while you look like a mess. It's embarrassing! "You got sick from falling into the pool and had to take meds while you're still breastfeeding! What kind of mom does that? Sandy's more of a mom to Oliver than you are. She even looks a bit like him. "I guess you're so unattractive your own kid didn't even want to take after you! Ugh, Sandy and Colin would've been such a perfect couple. Too bad they didn't get married back then." Sandy shot me a smug look, then forced a fake smile and said, "Please don't say that, Grace. Lucille might get upset." "Upset? I've watched you grow up and loved you like you were my own daughter. Who could have an issue with that? Lucille knows she's supposed to breastfeed Oliver, but she's still on meds. "If you weren't here to help feed him, he'd probably be starving by now! You're the only one I can count on. You really are my sweet goddaughter, Sandy!" I knew Grace looked down on me. If Sandy wasn't married to Mike Jensen, the oldest heir of Jensen Group, Grace would never have allowed Colin to marry me. Back then, Colin used to defend me when Grace put me down, but now, he wouldn't even look my way. His eyes were full of affection for Sandy. I turned away, refusing to look at this disgusting family. I pulled up the divorce papers I drafted on my phone and headed upstairs to the second-floor study. All I had to do was print them out and get Colin to sign. Then, I would be done with the Selwyns for good. I slid the freshly printed divorce papers into my bag and set off to find Colin. I thought he might be in the guest room, but as I passed our bedroom, I heard Sandy's voice, teasing and breathy. "My boobs feel so full, Colin. Can you help me massage them?" Colin's breathing sounded strained. "You're still recovering from giving birth, Sandy. You can't handle this. You already took a huge risk hiding the pregnancy from Mike and having my kid. I don't want to make things worse for you…" "I wanted your baby, Colin! Mike's hardly ever home. He doesn't know. Stop overthinking it. Come on, it really hurts. Hurry up and help me get the milk out…" After a moment of silence, I could hear the sounds of sucking and Sandy's moans coming from the room. The noises got more vulgar with every passing second. My face went pale, and my stomach twisted. I slapped my hand over my mouth and ran out of the house without looking back. It wasn't until I got outside and took a deep breath of the fresh air that the tightness in my heart started to let up. I thought I could keep it together, but watching them do that in our bedroom shattered what was left of my broken heart. How could he? With my head hanging, I sank by the front door. Out of nowhere, something wet and rancid hit me on the head. I reached up to touch it, only to realize it was a dirty diaper smeared with poop. Behind me, Sandy's laughter echoed. "Doesn't Oliver's poop smell just amazing, Lucille? Oh, wait—you probably don't know that Oliver is actually my son." She walked up to me, holding her phone, grinning like she just won something. "Colin smothered your baby to death to make room for Oliver. I even recorded it. Your son fought so hard, struggling for a full minute before his little limbs went limp. Want to see the video?" I stared at the screen in horror as Baby Selwyn thrashed under Colin's hand, his tiny body jerking helplessly. His face turned from red to purple before he finally went still. My whole body shook uncontrollably. How could anyone be that monstrous, watching a fragile life snuffed out without even flinching? "You shameless woman! I'll kill you!" I screamed. With bloodshot eyes, I raised my hand to slap Sandy as hard as I could. But just before I could, another hand clamped down on mine.