Death Is Where You’re Missing

After Roman Archer and I broke up, he devoted himself to academic research. He had finally become successful. During a television interview, he looked just as confident and high-spirited as he had been back then. The host asked whom he most wanted to share this news with. After a brief silence, he called me. “Celeste, thank you for leaving me. My career is thriving now.” I smiled. “Congratulations, Mr. Roman.” He would never know that if I had not left, he would have died. Chapter 1 Roman Archer was recognized as the nation’s youngest medical genius. His research on kidney disease treatment was expected to significantly reduce mortality rates. Meanwhile, I suffered from kidney failure. As I could not afford treatment, my attending physician was certain I would not survive the month. On television, the host asked Roman to call the person he could never truly let go of. “Back then, you looked down on me for not having any achievements. Do you regret it now?” I glanced at the hospital bill I could not afford. Then, I looked at him on the screen and chuckled softly. “Roman, you’re so successful now. Could you lend me a hundred thousand dollars?” The call was ruthlessly cut off. Roman let out a deep breath and faced the camera. “Okay, I can truly move on now.” Little did he know that when he suffered from kidney failure, I was the one who donated a kidney to him. After the interview ended, I received a deposit of one hundred thousand dollars in my bank account. I knew right away it was from him. The money was enough to cover my hospital stay and the expensive medication I could never afford. A moment later, I heard familiar footsteps outside my hospital ward. The door opened slightly, and to my surprise, I saw Roman. He stood there, looking as handsome as ever. Five years had passed, yet his facial features had not changed. They were still sharp and well-defined. Compared to before, he carried himself with greater composure and level-headedness. But one thing had changed. I was no longer the person standing by his side. Instead, beside him stood Blake Hayes. She was just as polished and elegant. Blake, the daughter of the director of Pinnacle Hospital, had been friends with Roman since childhood. They looked perfect together. I lowered my head, pretending not to see them, and quietly reached out to close the door. Before I could close it, a force shoved against me. I almost lost my balance. I steadied myself and looked up. Roman’s dark gaze met mine. He could easily detect the panic in my eyes. He gave me a quick glance, then looked away. It was as though even one more look would taint his sight. “It’s been years since we met. You don’t want to talk to me anymore?” My heart pounded. There was so much I wanted to say, but in the end, all I said was, “Give me another five hundred thousand dollars.” Roman froze for a moment. His once cold gaze shattered with fury. He grabbed my wrist. “We haven’t seen each other in five years, and now all you care about is money?” Sharp and unrelenting pain shot through my wrist. It reached my heart, which made me tremble in pain. “You’re a philanthropist now. I’m sure you’ve donated far more than this, and I’m sure that amount is enough to fund an entire library. For old times’ sake, please just lend me another five hundred thousand dollars.” Roman took a deep breath. Just as he was about to speak, Blake wrapped her hand around his arm. “Dear, is this your ex-girlfriend?” She tilted her head and looked at me. There was a hint of pity in her voice. “Do you really need to borrow five hundred thousand dollars? “Ms. Celeste, I should thank you for giving up such an exceptional man. If you hadn’t, I wouldn’t have met him.” I stayed silent. I was already lost in memories of Roman and me. Chapter 2 Roman and I were high school classmates. We had a beautiful and romantic mutual crush. We promised to apply to the same university. We were together for eight years. Back then, he had yet to become the outstanding genius he is today. We were just two ordinary students with nothing to our name. However, because we had each other, we became the most important people in each other’s lives. We promised to graduate, work hard, and use everything we had learned to build a future together. But just when we had finally secured stable jobs, Roman was diagnosed with a kidney disease. The cost of Medicare Part B injection drugs was insane. We spent all of our hard-earned savings, yet it was barely enough to keep things going. We applied for medical assistance, but we were rejected for not meeting the qualifications. To afford his treatment, I cut back on everything. Some days, I ate only one meal. At times, my meals cost no more than five dollars. Even then, it was barely enough to get by and pay for his medication. At my lowest point, I even searched through a garbage dump. I found out I was not the only one. Others were scavenging for food too. They were already digging through piles of waste. They moved in groups while glaring at me as if I were an outsider who was taking away their livelihood. A kidney transplant was the only way to save Roman, yet the wait felt endless. His condition worsened. He grew too weak to get out of bed. Just when all hope seemed lost, the doctor told me a match had been found. It was me. I stopped reminiscing and turned my gaze to the two people in front of me. Blake rested her head on Roman’s shoulder. He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. His gaze was filled with indescribable tenderness. “She had it coming. You’re the one I was meant to be with. “I won’t just buy you handbags. I’ll get you that spacious luxury apartment you like tomorrow.” I pulled my hand back and tried to suppress the emotions surging within me. But the bitterness lingered, suffocating me. I did not want to stay any longer. Just as I turned to leave, Blake casually nudged me with her elbow. I lost my balance and stumbled forward. “Oh my, Celeste! You really should watch where you’re going.” I fell, and my medical report and payment receipt were scattered at Roman’s feet. For a second, worry flickered in his eyes. He instinctively reached out to help me. But before he could, Blake grabbed his hand and gasped. “Dear, look!” Roman followed her gaze, picked up the document, and skimmed it. The mention of “hospitalization for kidney disease” caught his attention. His face twisted with anger. He threw the document at me. “Celeste, do you have no shame? You really stooped so low just for money? “It’s been five years. You haven’t changed at all. You’re still so obsessed with money, aren’t you?” From the strength in his voice, it was clear he was in perfect health. I forced a small smile, picked up the report, and made myself meet his gaze. “If you’re so rich, why not act like a real philanthropist and lend me a little more?” Blake covered her mouth and pretended to be shocked and hurt. But the ridicule in her eyes gave her away. “Roman, I don’t think she’s faking it. Maybe she really is sick. “It’s a good thing she left you back then. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have found a kidney donor. Aren’t you researching this field? Maybe you should help her.” She sounded as if she was speaking up for me. Yet every word was a pointed reminder to Roman that I had abandoned him for money when he was the one who had been sick. In an instant, whatever hesitation he had was gone. His gaze turned cold. “Using my research and academic achievements on her would be an insult to my work.” Chapter 3 Roman held Blake’s hand and turned to leave. She was still pleading on my behalf. But when she glanced back, I caught the look in her eyes. The pity was just an act. Beneath it was nothing but gloating and malice. I picked up the crumpled medical report from the floor. A sharp pain suddenly shot through my lower back. Dizziness washed over me. I pressed against the wall and inched toward the bed. By the time I reached it, I had no strength left. I stared at the words “kidney disease” on the paper, then instinctively placed my hand over the source of my pain. Beneath my fingertips, I felt a jagged, uneven scar. Underneath it, a healthy kidney was missing. Roman had a scar just like mine. Five years ago, he had grown weaker by the day as he waited endlessly for a donor. He had grown so thin that he was nothing but skin and bones. Death loomed closer each day. In the end, I gave him my kidney. Losing one kidney had not killed me. But the complications that followed were a different story. Without money, I could not afford my medication. I kept running out and missing doses, which caused me to miss my best chance at recovery. Over time, my body weakened. My immune system became so fragile that even a gust of wind could make me sick. The stabbing pain in my lower back kept me awake night after night. Weakness and fatigue had long become my everyday reality. I was facing the same fate Roman once did, only mine was even worse. There was no kidney donor for me. I had no money for treatment. And there would never be someone who would do for me what I had done for him. I knew it then. My time was almost up. After leaving the hospital, I returned to the basement I had rented. It was dark and damp. The air was heavy and stale with no windows to let in even the smallest breeze. However, this was all I could afford. This was where Roman and I had lived back then. No matter how terrible the conditions were, they could not take away the sweetness of our love. When the doctor told me my kidney was a match for his, I felt relieved. As long as he lived, nothing else mattered. So, I found an excuse to start a fight. I said things so cruel that even I was shaken by my own words. Roman and I had been together for so long that we knew each other better than anyone else. That also meant I knew exactly what would break him. I knew how to make him lose all hope in me. Otherwise, with the way he loved me, he would never have agreed to take my kidney. I believed he was just like me. He would rather die than see me suffer. To save him, I had no choice but to harden my heart and make him believe I had had enough of him. I told him he was a useless cripple who could never give me the life I wanted. I could still picture that day as if it had just happened. He had always been strong and optimistic. No matter how close he came to his death, he never lost hope. But that day, for the first time, he broke down. He covered his face and sobbed uncontrollably. He fell to his knees and begged me. With his shaky voice, he swore he would recover. I just needed to give him more time. I could not say a word. I knew if I did, I would break down too. That day, I picked up my small suitcase and left without looking back. I kept walking faster, as if speeding up could drown out the sound of his agonized cries. I became the woman who abandoned the man I loved for money. I gave up on the one person I cherished most in exchange for his chance to live. After the surgery, I returned to the tiny basement that held every memory of us. I sat there in silence while waiting for death to come for me once again. I never thought I would see Roman again. Chapter 4 He had become a renowned surgeon. The illness that had once nearly defeated him had become a condition he could cure. The future we had once dreamed of together had come true for him. On the other hand, I had no future left. His interviews were everywhere. They were on TV, in newspapers, and all over social media. Everyone praised him for his talent and bright future. A strange, bitter feeling crept over me. Yet, I felt a faint trace of happiness too. At least his future was bright. The sudden ringing of my phone snapped me out of my thoughts. It was the bank. They told me the transfer of one hundred thousand dollars had been a mistake. I had to return the money immediately. If I failed to return it, they would take legal action. After hanging up, I lay on my bed and stared at the stained ceiling. My mouth was filled with unbearable bitterness. It was like I had swallowed something vile. After a long while, I called Lily and asked her to help me find a job. Roman must have done this on purpose. Since he thought I loved money so much, he must have wanted to see me experience the disappointment of gaining it, losing it, and then struggling to pay it back. Because of my health, I could not apply for just any job. I was unable to handle heavy labor, nor could I endure exhaustion or stress. There were too many jobs I simply could not do. As Lily put it, at least I still had my looks. And so, I ended up taking a part-time job at a high-end business club. The pay was good. It was fifty dollars an hour. That night, I dressed in an elegant gown and stood at the entrance to greet guests. That was when I saw Roman again. He wore an expensive suit, which made him look even more handsome and strikingly confident. Blake was dressed in a custom-made gown. Every movement she made was elegant and breathtaking. Roman opened the car door for her, then took her hand and led her inside. I could only stand at the entrance, smile, and bow to them. At first, Roman did not notice me. But just as I lowered my head, Blake suddenly spoke. “Bring my suitcase inside. Be careful. Everything inside is extremely valuable.” I was not in a position to refuse. As soon as I lifted the suitcase, I realized how heavy it was. With my current strength, I simply could not carry it all the way to the guest room. Sure enough, I lost my balance and fell. The suitcase burst open and spilled everything inside. “Oh no! My Van Cleef & Arpels jewelry!” Blake’s sharp gasp drew everyone’s attention to me. Roman frowned as he looked at me. Blake’s eyes were filled with contempt. Without warning, she shoved me. Her long nails dug into my skin. It sent a sharp pain through my arm. “Where’s the manager? Is this how you treat your guests?” She looked furious, but I could see the smugness in her smile. Roman took a small step forward as if he was going to help me up. But he hesitated and withdrew his hand. He raised a hand and stopped the approaching manager. Then, he raised an eyebrow and looked at me. “That was very rude of you, Celeste.” Blake gasped and pretended to have just recognized me. She immediately pulled me to my feet. “Celeste, I never thought I’d see you here. Even if you’re Roman’s ex, you shouldn’t be working as a hostess. Shouldn’t you be doing something more respectable?” Her voice was loud enough for everyone to hear. The room instantly filled with mocking laughter. Chapter 5 “So, this is Dr. Roman’s ex-girlfriend? I heard she abandoned him when he was at his lowest.” “Really? Then she doesn’t deserve any sympathy.” “Exactly. Women like her should be picking up trash on the streets.” Before I could react, someone splashed red wine over my head. Juice, milk, and more wine followed. Glass after glass hit me, shattering upon impact. The people around me wanted to curry favor with Roman. They seized the chance to vent his anger on his behalf. Blood trickled down my forehead and stained my face. I felt nothing. My heart had long since gone numb. Roman watched me with a cold and indifferent gaze. “Celeste, don’t you have anything to say? Do I have to pay you just to get you to talk to me? “Looks like you’ve studied my schedule well. You came here just to ask me for money, didn’t you?” He pointed at the stacks of wine crates beside the waiters and said, “Move all of these to the storage room. Do that, and I’ll give you five hundred thousand dollars.” He was doing this on purpose. Even at my healthiest, I was never strong. With my illness, I had grown even weaker. I could barely lift anything heavy. Even walking a few extra steps left me gasping for breath. To me, those crates might as well have been an immovable mountain. My doctor had warned me: if I wanted to live longer, I had to rest. I could not overexert myself. But I had no choice. I looked at him and asked, “Do I still need to pay back the hundred thousand dollars you gave me?” His expression hardened as he emitted a cold aura. He was furious. “No.” The moment he gave his answer, I did not hesitate. I grabbed the heavy box and started dragging it toward the storage room one step at a time. It was so heavy that I felt like I could collapse at any second. I gritted my teeth and forced myself forward. Roman was right behind me. I could not collapse. By the time I finished moving one box, I was drenched in sweat. My legs trembled uncontrollably, and my heart pounded wildly I did not dare stop. I was afraid that if I did, I would die. So, I picked up another box immediately. This time, my steps became even slower. In the end, I could only stand still and hold the crate with trembling hands. Everyone watched with mocking eyes. They were treating this as nothing more than a joke. Only Roman’s expression darkened further. It usually took two waiters to lift a single box. That showed just how heavy they were. When I reached for another, Roman finally lost his patience and pressed down on my shoulders. “Celeste, is money really that important to you? Will you die without it?” His eyes were bloodshot. I looked at him and nodded. “Yes. Without money, I’ll die.” His anger intensified as he shoved me away. “Fine! Move them all! Don’t leave a single one behind!” I bent down to pick up a box, but before I could straighten up, he stacked another on top. Combined, they weighed as much as a twelve-year-old child. My legs gave out, and I collapsed to the floor. The bottles inside the box shattered, and broken glass pierced my hands. Dark red liquid spilled everywhere like fresh blood staining the floor. A searing pain tore through my waist. I felt completely drained. My breathing grew weak. But it was not over yet. I struggled to get up, but my body no longer had the strength to move. Seeing me like this, Roman finally reached his limit. “That’s enough!” he yelled. I could no longer hold on. My body gave out, and I lay motionless on the floor. At that moment, Lily burst into the room. She screamed at Roman sharply as she rushed to hold me in her arms. “Roman, you’ve gone too far! Cece gave you her kidney! She only has one left! If you keep this up, she’ll die!”