Love to the Brink, Only Empty Joy

He handed me the scarf. It was blood red, glaringly bright. Ironically, that was Selah's favorite color. But for me, it was the color I hated most. Cora had a congenital heart condition, and the sight of red always terrified me. "Get that stupid scarf out of my face!" I snapped. Oliver clearly hadn't expected me to be so angry. He frowned and said, "If you don't like it, fine, but there's no need to make such a fuss. "If it's because of Cora, I'll arrange for dinner tomorrow or the day after. That work for you?" He tossed the scarf and its box onto the floor. To him, even a half-hearted gift was nothing more than trash. I said, "Oliver, have you ever noticed that Cora isn't here? Don't you wonder where she's gone?" He waved his hand dismissively and lay back down. He said, "If she's not home, she's at the hospital. I've visited her there before." He didn't care at all. I'd misjudged him. That was on me. I said, "Oliver, next month, go ahead and marry Selah. I'm done." His face darkened, and his voice turned cold with a hint of threat. He grunted, "Amber, my patience has its limits. "If you keep this up, don't blame me for sending Cora abroad for treatment. "Don't think I don't know what you're doing. Ever since Cora came along, you've used every excuse to tie me down. "Cora is a child, not some tool for you to manipulate." He tugged at his tie, threw open the door, and stormed out. And once again, it was like this. He knew Cora was just a kid. But I was her mother who wished nothing but the best for her. To everyone else, Oliver could be polite, refined even. But with me, he was a bully. He used Cora to threaten me, to make me back down, to force an apology, and to beg for his forgiveness. Not this time. I packed Cora's things, and without a backward glance, I left.

It was funny. I know Woiddiff better than Selah ever could. After all, it was where Oliver and I first met. Back when I was studying art and design there. Supplies were expensive. I barely got by sketching portraits for tourists on the streets of Woiddiff. One evening, as I was about to pack up and head home, Oliver appeared. He looked scruffy, but even then, his good looks were hard to miss. I had noticed him before. He'd been watching me as I painted, stealing glances for quite a while, though I pretended not to see. Finally, as I was closing up, he walked over. He said, "Hey, you're from Clens too, right? I got robbed, and now I don't have any money. If you could..." I stared at him, full of doubt. He grew more flustered, not knowing what to do with his hands. He said, "I'm really sorry. I'm not a scammer, I swear. I heard you speaking the Clens language just now. That's why I approached you. I'll leave right now, sorry." His awkward, helpless look made me laugh. He took a few steps away but then circled back. "Seriously, I'm not a scammer," he insisted. "And also, um, you're really beautiful. I mean, uh, I just wanted to remind you. There are pickpockets everywhere. Be careful." His face flushed red before he even finished his sentence, and he spun around, hurrying off. Woiddiff at sunset was breathtaking. He disappeared into the fading light, and for some reason, my heart skipped a beat. On a whim, I called after him. I said, "My name's Amber Barnes. Nice to meet you."

That was how I met Oliver. At the time, for some unknown reason, he had fallen out with his family. Back then, he didn't look like the heir to the Hall Group because he didn't have his family's financial support. I thought he was just an ordinary person like me, stranded in a foreign land. We lived in a small town near Woiddiff. I went to classes and painted during the day. He either came with me or waited at home. Occasionally, he took odd jobs to make some money. Neither of us could cook, but after being abroad for a while, we got homesick and gradually learned to cook. Our biggest joy was walking to a supermarket two kilometers away on weekends to buy discounted vegetables. Then, we'd cook together while being scolded by our roommates. We crammed into that tiny room, living together without any reservations. We were in love for a year in a foreign land. It should have been tough, but I felt incredibly happy. It was in the last month in Woiddiff that I discovered I was pregnant. By the river, Oliver made a ring out of irises and proposed to me. At that time, I didn't realize that a ring made of flowers symbolized something fleeting. It was a mirage gone in an instant. Just like Oliver's promises to me, everything changed once we returned home. He turned out to be the heir to the Hall Group, and he had an ex-girlfriend named Selah. In fact, the reason he went to Woiddiff was because Selah was there. Selah was his first love, and for her, he didn't hesitate to break ties with his family. That was why he was in such a mess when I met him. The funny thing was, if it weren't for Selah, I wouldn't have met Oliver. And according to the Hall family, I could never measure up to them. Even when Oliver begged his parents, he didn't have the power to marry me back then. So, I ended up having Cora on my own. Unfortunately, Cora was born with a congenital heart disease, and to treat her, I had to stay tied to Oliver. Three years ago, Selah returned to the country, and Oliver and I grew apart. But for Cora's sake, I kept begging Oliver to stay. Finally, he agreed to marry me next month. Looking back now, what wasn't meant to be mine was never going to be. Just like now, I'd lost Cora. And I no longer had any feelings left for Oliver.

After a long and exhausting journey with Cora's belongings, I finally made it back to my hometown. Cora had once told me how much she loved this place, especially because of the sea. All she ever wanted was to play by the seaside with her parents. But in the end, she never got the chance. She passed before Oliver could ever bring her here to play. I thought I would have a moment of peace to collect myself, but suddenly, Oliver barged in with people. Selah was among them. Oliver glared at me and demanded, "Amber, what have you done? Where is Cora? Where did you take her?" I stared at him silently. Now he cared. It was laughable. "What do you want? Just say it," I responded coldly. Selah, half-leaning on Oliver, raised an eyebrow. She sneered, "I shouldn't have left Cora with you. Look at what you've taught her to do." I was confused. They didn't seem angry about me leaving without a word or taking Cora. Instead, it was as if they had come to accuse me of something. But what could Cora have done to upset them like this? Oliver sulked, "I know you don't like Selah, but how could you teach Cora to hurt people? That's a line you shouldn't cross!" He pulled Selah closer and pointed at a small red mark on her wrist. I was utterly baffled. What did that have to do with Cora? He continued, "Don't play dumb. Did you tell Cora to put mango in Selah's coffee? You know she's allergic!" I glanced at the tiny red mark on Selah's hand and almost laughed. How would I know about her mango allergy, and why would it have anything to do with me? I asked, "When? Tell me when Cora had the chance to slip something into her coffee." I kept packing Cora's things. Oliver hadn't expected such a reaction from me and stepped forward to grab my hand. "Let go!" I snapped. I jerked my hand free. I didn't expect him to pull so hard that I fell. Cora's things were scattered all over the floor.

Looking at the belongings scattered across the floor, I couldn't help but shout out. I desperately tried to gather everything back together. I thought Oliver had rushed here because he realized that Cora was already gone. I thought he brought Selah to apologize. But no, instead of grieving, they were here to blame her for something she didn't do. Selah, disgusted, stepped on Cora's favorite teddy bear with her red high heels. She snapped, "Oliver, she is still lying. "I ran into Cora at the hospital the other day, and I was kind enough to buy her a cup of coffee. It was a special order, you know. "Amber, if you have an issue with me, just say it. There's no need to involve a child." It was unbelievable. Not only was Cora being treated in a specialized heart hospital that Selah had no access to, but two days ago, Cora was already gone. I bit my lip and, with the last of my patience, looked up at Selah. I said, "Move your foot. And get out." Selah raised her eyebrow even higher, grinding her heel into the bear. She crushed it underfoot. The stuffing spilled out as her sharp heel dug in. I couldn't take it anymore. I threw myself at Selah and pushed her down. I grabbed the teddy bear from under her. Before I could even start putting the stuffing back in, Oliver's people pinned me down. The teddy bear was torn in half during the struggle. "No..." I cried out, staring at the broken bear. It was just like Cora that day, broken and fragile. It was all my fault. I couldn't even protect Cora's last belongings. I collapsed to the floor, sobbing uncontrollably. Oliver hadn't expected this reaction from me. His eyes were full of shock and disgust, like he couldn't understand how I had ended up like this. How did I end up like this? He demanded, "You should apologize to Selah, or you'll never see Cora again!" I knelt there, surrounded by the mess, and let out a cold laugh. It felt like my smile was slipping downward no matter how hard I tried to keep it in place. I wobbled out of the room. Oliver grew even angrier, calling his assistant on speaker. He ordered his assistant to send Cora abroad and prevent me from seeing her again. There was silence on the other end of the line before the assistant finally stammered, "Sir, Cora had a heart attack in front of the house. She passed away." "What? Say that again!" Oliver kept asking for confirmation. The others who had come with him also verified it. Cora was dead. I listened as they repeated over and over how Cora had died. The pain in my heart was unbearable. I gathered what little strength I had left and stumbled away from them. I headed for the beach. I sat down in the sand, watching the waves come and go. Compared to Oliver's, Selah's reaction was more dramatic. Selah screamed, claiming she had twisted her ankle. Oliver ignored her. He staggered after me, shouting my name, but when he got close, he stopped. He didn't come near me. He looked as if too afraid to face me. He stood just a few steps away, mumbling to himself, "No, it can't be. Her condition was stable. She was healthy. She couldn't be gone." I finally turned to look at him. He grabbed my hand like a drowning man clutching a lifeline. He said, "Amber! You're lying, right? You're punishing me. You've convinced everyone to lie to me, right? "I was wrong. I shouldn't have left. I shouldn't have gone to Woiddiff with Selah. I'm sorry." He babbled on, apologizing incoherently. So, he knew. He knew he was in the wrong, that he had been too close to Selah. He knew that he had crossed a line. He just didn't want to admit it. He continued, "No, it's not true. "If Cora really died, why didn't you tell me? She's our daughter." Oliver was as mad and broken as I had been moments ago. But I didn't pity him at all. The waves wet his pant legs, and he stumbled, falling into the sand. I heard him sobbing. "Why? Cora is my daughter. How could I not know? "Amber, I'm sorry. I wasn't blaming you. I'm sorry." He kept repeating our names and apologizing. The others didn't dare approach him, but Selah wasn't giving up. She limped forward and tried to stop me from leaving.