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Half a Life Misgiven, Old Dreams Cold
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After I gave birth, the wives of my husband's business partners came together to visit me. Smiling, I showed them the baby clothes and pacifiers my husband had bought for our daughter abroad, and the ...
章節（4）
第1章
After I gave birth, the wives of my husband's business partners came together to visit me.
Smiling, I showed them the baby clothes, the pacifier, and the custom-made stroller Edwin Weiss had bought for our daughter abroad.
But they only exchanged glances, and after some hesitation, spoke with an odd look on their faces.
"These baby clothes are an old style. The collar's clearly yellowed. Anyone can tell they've been used."
"The pacifier was a promotional freebie from that brand two years ago, and the stroller tires are badly worn. It's probably been used plenty of times."
I froze where I stood, my fingertips gone cold.
The precious things Edwin claimed he'd handpicked and had custom-made were all dusty, secondhand junk.
Clutching my baby, I stumbled out the door and went straight to his company.
Through the half-open office door, I saw him holding Matilda Henson in his arms.
"Don't worry. You and your son are the family that matters most to me."
Matilda pouted and beat playfully at his chest. "Then why did you marry her in the first place?"
He gave a sneering laugh and pinched her chin.
"It's just a nine-ninety-nine fake certificate. Something to fool her with."
"Even the people picking through trash out there know quality better than she does. She deserves to be cheated."
A boy of three or four sat by his knee, calling him "Daddy" in a whiny voice.
The sunlight fell over the three of them like a perfect family portrait.
And my daughter and I were nothing but two extra shadows.
...
I pushed the door open and walked in. Edwin froze for a moment and let go of Matilda.
"What are you doing here?"
There wasn't a trace of guilt or shame in his eyes, only the irritation of being interrupted.
My throat closed up, and it was a long moment before I could speak. "You've had a child together all this time, and everything you gave my daughter was her son's used castoffs?"
He laughed softly, careless. "What did you expect? Did you really think I'd waste my time buying things for you?"
Ten years by his side, and all I got in return was his deceit.
Then what were my daughter and I, really?
"But you said you'd only ever have eyes for me!"
He was the one who chased me for a year. He was the one who swore he'd never have another.
But now the warmth was gone, and the man with the cold face was still Edwin.
He cut me off, looking down at me from above.
"Lorna Winfield, do you know why I got together with you in the first place?"
"Back then I'd just started my company. I was out meeting clients and chasing investment every day. In business, appearances matter most, and I needed someone I could take out in public."
"You were a TV host then. You knew how to talk, knew your limits. With you standing beside me, people thought I had taste."
So in his mind, I had only ever been a prop to make him look respectable.
Beside him, Matilda let out a smug little laugh, hugging the boy as she looked down on me.
"Back when Edwin got with you, I hadn't graduated from the dance academy yet. Otherwise he never would've picked you!"
I ignored her, my nails digging into my palms.
"Edwin, you were the one who told me to quit. You said you had money now, that you didn't need me out there in the spotlight, that I should stay home in peace and be the good wife."
He frowned, impatient. "But you spend all day at home raising a kid, looking a mess. When my business partners see you now, they think I brought home a nanny for a wife."
"If you had even a shred of sense, you'd know I was just being polite back then. You believed it yourself. Whose fault is that?"
The boy suddenly ran over and kicked me in the shin.
"You're a bad woman! Don't come and steal my daddy!"
My body was still weak, fresh from giving birth, and the pain made me stagger back a step.
Matilda strolled over unhurried and led the boy back.
"Baby, don't mind her. She's one of your daddy's friends who doesn't know how to behave."
My daughter woke in my arms, her little mouth crumpling as she let out a faint cry.
But Edwin acted as if he heard nothing, as though even one glance was too much to spare.
"Lorna Winfield, if you know what's good for you, you'll go home and raise the kid quietly. Stop showing up to grate on my eyes."
"Go home. Don't embarrass yourself here. Just pretend none of this ever happened."
"As long as you behave, I won't turn against you openly. After all, to outsiders you're still my faithful wife."
I wanted to break down and demand answers, but reason told me:
Everything he said was right. I truly had nothing to fight him with.
All the family's money was in Edwin's hands. I didn't have a cent of savings, no ground to stand on to go head-to-head with him.
I turned with my daughter in my arms and walked out.
Before the door closed behind me, I heard Matilda's voice.
"Edwin, the baby kicked her just now. She won't cause trouble, will she?"
"That kid of hers didn't get bumped or scraped. More to the point, is our son's foot hurting?"
I felt as if I'd fallen into a pit of ice. My voice came out hoarse as I soothed my daughter.
"Mommy's here. Nina isn't afraid."
第2章
I carried my daughter home and called a private investigator.
【Look into Edwin Weiss and Matilda Henson. I want to know when it started.】
By that afternoon the report was in my hands.
Photos, hotel records, credit card statements. I turned the pages one by one, my breath coming faster and faster.
The third year of our marriage, I was working the dinner circuit, entertaining his business partners, drinking until my stomach bled and I ended up in the hospital.
And he, at a ceremony to donate a school building, met Matilda Henson, still a student who hadn't graduated yet.
Not long after my first miscarriage, Edwin took her along on a business trip to the Bahamas.
The two of them shared one suite for a full week.
On our wedding anniversary he said he was busy meeting a client. He was really at a yacht dinner with Matilda.
When Matilda gave birth, he was there for every minute of the delivery, and he saw to every last detail of her recovery himself.
But when I had our daughter, he said he had an urgent international meeting.
I suddenly remembered a night early in our relationship, curled up against him watching TV.
The news on the screen was about a man exposed for cheating while his wife was pregnant.
I said, offhand, "People online say a man usually only keeps up the act until the woman gets pregnant. You wouldn't do that, would you?"
He lowered his head, kissed the top of my hair, and pulled me in tighter.
"I'll never let you suffer the smallest bit in this life."
But he broke that promise. He only kept up the act until I'd given birth.
That night, Edwin came home with Matilda and the boy.
"Matilda's neighborhood lost power tonight. I couldn't leave them in a hotel."
"Go tidy up the guest room and run a bath. The boy needs a warm soak before bed."
I stood in the entryway and didn't move. The boy kicked off his shoes and clambered onto the sofa.
Peeling off her coat, Matilda laughed. "Careful, sweetie, don't hurt yourself."
My daughter woke crying in her crib and I hurried over to soothe her.
The boy came and hung off the crib railing, peering in. "So this is that little bastard? She's so ugly."
He suddenly reached in and grabbed at my daughter's face, and his sharp nails left a streak of blood.
I couldn't hold the anger back any longer. "Get away from her! Where are your manners?"
Matilda crouched and gathered the boy up. "Don't be upset, Lorna. He just thinks the baby's cute, he wanted to touch her."
I stared at the beads of blood on my daughter's face, my heart aching. "Cute? Then how about I draw a line across your son's face and we see? Why should my daughter suffer this?"
Edwin came at the noise, his tone flat.
"How much strength can a little kid have? You're a grown woman, can't you just give the boy a little slack?"
I looked at him, unable to believe it. "Your daughter's face is bleeding and you haven't glanced at her once, start to finish. Are you blind?"
He faltered, probably not expecting me to lose my temper.
"What are you throwing a fit for? Is a little thing like this worth all the shouting?"
I was shaking all over with rage. "Since she was born, you've never held her once, never hushed her once. Is this how you're a father?"
He rubbed the space between his brows, all weariness. "I'm worn out enough running the company every day. Do you have to bother me with this petty nonsense?"
I looked at him with a bitter smile. "Edwin, the day I had her I was in labor for fourteen hours, and you wouldn't even pick up the phone."
"I hemorrhaged after the birth and nearly died on the table, and you had a nurse sign for you."
"I told myself you were busy with work, I tried so hard to understand. But you were with Matilda and your son the whole time."
His face darkened. "Enough. What's the point of dragging up the past? Can't you have some dignity?"
Matilda gave his sleeve a soft tug. "Edwin, let me take the baby to rest. Don't let him hear all this ugliness."
Edwin nodded, and his eyes were cold when they landed on me.
"I'll sleep in the guest room with Matilda and my son. You calm yourself down."
All at once I felt so tired. Something broke inside my chest.
"Let's separate."
He didn't catch that I hadn't said divorce. His mouth curled into a sneer.
"Lorna Winfield, what did you say?"
"Go ahead and make a scene if you want, see if anyone believes you. Do you know what I'm worth now? What do you think you have to stand up to me with?"
"You don't even have a job. You think a court will give our daughter to you? What would you raise her on?"
I opened my mouth, my throat tightening.
He said coldly, "If you know what's good for you, you'll stay home like a good girl and raise the child. You'll get every cent of your allowance."
"Otherwise I'll leave you with nothing, and you'll never see the child again."
"Think it over. Where could you go without me? Could you even survive?"
第3章
I swallowed the sourness flooding my mouth and said quietly,
"If my daughter and I leave, you three get to be one happy little family. Isn't that what you want?"
Edwin let out a scornful laugh, pulled out a folder, and tossed it at my feet.
"Before you go, read this carefully first."
I opened the file. If the relationship between the two parties breaks down, the woman must immediately vacate the residence held in the man's name upon dissolution of the relationship.
That was after his company went public. I'd come off my shift at the station and brought him a late-night meal.
He handed me an agreement and told me to sign, said he was transferring me ten percent of the company's shares.
I signed without even reading it. It never occurred to me that he'd been guarding against me from that very moment.
It meant that even if I left him and took our daughter, I'd have no money and nowhere to live.
Seeing me go silent, he shot me a look with faint distaste.
"If you've got nothing left to say, go to sleep. Don't stand around here wasting my time. I still have to read Ferdie his bedtime story."
I carried my daughter back to the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at nothing.
A little after two in the morning, her fever suddenly shot up to a hundred and three point six.
I rushed out of the bedroom with her in my arms and pounded on the guest room door.
"Edwin, Nina's burning up, please, take us to the hospital now!"
It was a long time before the door opened, just a crack. Edwin's face was dark.
"What's all this in the middle of the night? You've woken Ferdie up."
Matilda's lazy voice drifted over. "Ferdie ran fevers before too. Just give her some fever medicine and she'll be fine."
"Is there any need to make such a fuss? Who even knows if it's real or she's putting it on."
Edwin yawned at that and said dismissively,
"Can't you call a cab yourself? If I drive you to the hospital and back I won't get any sleep."
The door shut. Holding my daughter, I went cold all over.
The rideshare app showed no cars nearby. I wrapped her in my coat, grabbed an umbrella, and ran out the door.
The rain was pouring, and the cold had me shaking.
By the time I reached the ER I was soaked through.
The doctor examined her and frowned.
"An hour later and it would've turned into pneumonia. How can a parent be this careless?"
The patient in the next bed suddenly leaned over and looked at me.
"Lorna? Why are you in such a state?"
It was Yvonne Finch, my old boss from the station.
She quickly sat up and looked me over. "Why are you taking care of the baby all by yourself? Where's your husband?"
"I even went to your wedding. Your husband was so good to you. How could he let you carry your sick child out in the rain all alone?"
My eyes stung and swelled. I pretended to bend down and tuck in her blanket. "He... he's away on business."
Yvonne muttered, "What job could matter more than a wife and kid? Men really don't treasure anything once they've got it."
"Go clean yourself up. I'll watch the baby for you."
I nodded and walked into the restroom.
The person in the mirror was pale-faced, eyes red-rimmed, lips cracked and peeling.
I splashed water on my face, and the drops ran down mixed with tears.
By dawn her fever had broken completely. The doctor said they'd keep her under observation and she could be discharged by afternoon.
Before Yvonne left she pressed a thermos into my hands, filled with hot water she'd just gotten.
"Lorna, back when you resigned I tried to keep you. With your talent you'd be sitting in the station's top host spot by now."
"The station's planning to send someone to Crestport to launch a new news-interview program. If you're interested, call me anytime."
That evening I carried my daughter home, and the moment I pushed the door open I froze.
The wedding photo that had hung on the living room wall was thrown in the trash.
The nursery had been completely transformed. The crib was gone.
In its place stood a car-shaped bed a little boy would love, with Legos and toy cars scattered across the floor.
Matilda's voice came from behind me. "Ferdie and I are moving in. It's more comfortable over here."
"Edwin says you and your daughter will take the guest room from now on. You won't mind, will you?"
第4章
The whole thing was so absurd I didn't want to waste another word on her.
Then Matilda leaned close to my ear and dropped her voice.
"Before you quit the station, someone showed up making a scene, saying you'd seduced a married man."
"Do you have any idea? Edwin paid that person to do it."
A ringing filled my ears, and I could barely stay on my feet.
"He wanted you to stay home and out of the public eye, but he was afraid that if he said it outright you wouldn't quit. So he came up with that."
Matilda wasn't finished. "Lorna, your daughter's a worthless little burden and she doesn't even rate her own bedroom. Don't tell me you actually think you're the lady of this house."
"Her own father can't stand the two of you, and here you are putting on airs like the woman of the house."
My chest was heaving. I shoved him hard.
"Say one more word about my daughter. Go ahead."
She was about to fire back when Edwin came in from the study. "What's all the noise?"
Matilda's eyes went red in an instant. "Edwin, she just went crazy and hit me!"
Edwin slapped me across the face. "Who said you could touch her?"
My left cheek burned. I swallowed a mouthful of blood and said quietly,
"Edwin, is there anything else you've been keeping from me?"
He shook out his hand and looked at me like I was some lunatic throwing a tantrum.
"No. Stop chasing shadows."
Ten years of trust, and now the pieces were too broken to fit back together.
I packed my suitcase, picked up my daughter, and checked into a hotel nearby.
I hesitated a long while before I took out my phone and messaged Yvonne.
【Yvonne, I'll come to Crestport. Can I get an advance on my pay?】
Yvonne answered almost the second I sent it: 【Yes. I'll set up the paperwork tomorrow. Pack up and come whenever you're ready.】
【Don't worry about housing. The station can arrange a dorm.】
The day before I left, I went back to the house.
My daughter had a gold longevity locket, the one my parents left before they passed.
I'd just pulled open the drawer and taken it out when Matilda shrieked,
"Lorna, you shameless woman. You already moved out and now you come back to steal things!"
The front door was open, and a few neighbors poked their heads in to look.
Seeing them, Matilda put a wounded sob into her voice. "I'm Edwin's real wife. She's the other woman who forced her way in, and she even had a child in secret to try and push me out."
"Now that I've caught her, she's come back to get even by stealing!"
The neighbor, Cindy Lambert, looked at me with disgust. "Kids these days really have no shame."
I was shaking with anger. "This is my daughter's locket. I didn't steal it."
Edwin walked in right then, his voice flat.
"Matilda's right. How is what you're doing any different from stealing? Stop embarrassing yourself and get out."
"I'd like to see whether you can even survive without me."
I didn't argue anymore. As I turned to leave, Matilda tripped me from behind.
I stumbled and fell, my knee cracking against the doorframe, a big bruise already blooming.
I bent down and kissed my daughter's little face, red from crying, and said in a hoarse voice,
"Mommy's taking you away. This time, we're never coming back."